What if Thanos Snapped Away College Football Teams
There are 131 FBS college football teams. In Avengers: Infinity War, Thanos snapped away half of all living things. From a college football standpoint, half seems excessive, so what if we snap away 15% of all FBS teams (20 total).
Notre Dame -Yes, we’re starting off with the big one. In Avengers: Infinity War, some big names were snapped away, such as Black Panther and Spiderman. So why Notre Dame? 0-8 in BCS/CFP games since 2000 and they refuse to join a conference. Plus, ND starting QBs have lost 24 consecutive NFL games.
Auburn – It’s pretty simple. Alabama rules the state, so what is Auburn’s purpose? But more importantly, Auburn used to employ current Alabama Senator Tommy Tuberville, who is a horrible politician, horrible football coach, and horrible person. For that reason, Auburn is out.
Louisville – Louisville, KY is known for two things – the Derby and Bourbon. While football is a fun hobby and distraction, Louisville is, and forever will be, a basketball school first. Focus on that and bourbon, while waiting for the first Saturday in May.
Georgia Tech – no reason to have two teams playing in Atlanta and I want to see the Georgia State program continue to grow in the Sun Belt.
Indiana – When you think of the Indiana Hoosiers, you immediately think of basketball, and that’s okay. Indiana is a basketball state! Hoosiers football can go. They haven’t won a bowl game since 1991 and since 2015, have gone 0-4 in DRAMATIC fashion each time.
- 2015 Pinstripe Bowl
- 2016 Foster Farms Bowl
- 2019 Gator Bowl
- 2020 – Outback Bowl
Plus, as you can see from the main image, they can’t even spell their name right…
California – There are 7 FBS teams in the state of California, and if you ask me, the one with the least brand recognition, is the one literally named after the state. USC, UCLA, Stanford, Fresno State, San Diego State, and San Jose State come to mind, before Cal does.
West Virginia – Without the Mountaineers, there would be a lot less drunk children.
Colorado – Folsom Field has been in existence since 1924 and was last renovated in 2003. Colorado State’s beautiful new Canvas Stadium opened in 2017, which is why the Rams stay and the Buffaloes go extinct.
USF – University of SOUTH Florida is located in Tampa, which isn’t really considered south, especially when you consider 4 of the 6 other Florida schools are below USF. They share a stadium with the Bucs and don’t really get a lot of support. They were ranked #2 at one point in 2007 and haven’t been good since.
UConn – 2010 was the culmination of the Huskies’ peak. It was their fourth straight bowl appearance, and as Big East champs they appeared in the Fiesta Bowl under the old BCS format. Since than, they have produced 10 consecutive losing seasons and have 4 total wins since 2018. They left the AAC after 2019 to go Independent, because their basketball program moved on to the Big East. Without a conference affiliation, Huskies have nowhere to go except 6-6 and generic bowl games every couple of years.
Eastern Michigan – Ypsi is famous for being home to the first Dominos Pizza. It will no longer be famous for being the home of the Eastern Michigan Eagles football team.
East Carolina – There’s a North Carolina and a South Carolina. There is no East Carolina.
Temple – Owls have such little support that they play in an empty NFL stadium every week. They used to be so bad, that they got kicked out of the Big East after the 2004 season.
UNLV – Sorry, but there are better and more important things to do in Las Vegas, than support a college football team, especially now with NFL and NHL pro teams in town.
Bowling Green – Western Kentucky plays in Bowling Green, Kentucky and Bowling Green plays in Bowling Green, Ohio. Why are there two teams playing in Bowling Green in two different states? Ohio has plenty of other teams.
Rice – Same deal as noted earlier. Houston doesn’t need two college programs, especially when they also have an NFL team (kind of) to support.
Liberty – Did you know the state of Virginia has 5 college football teams, and three of the cities end in “burg”. Liberty plays in Lynchburg, and has a racist President, which is enough of a reason to wipe them off the map.
Florida International – FIU is located in Miami. I know, Miami loves it’s football, but do they really need two college teams plus a pro team?
New Mexico State – Two winning seasons since 2000 and 1 bowl game appearance since 1960. Does the state of New Mexico seriously need two college football teams? (honestly, do they even need 1?)
UMass – Minutemen have been an FBS team since 2012, and have yet to produce a winning record, or even win more than 4 games in a season. They have an overall FBS record of 20-92. Gross.
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